Disillusion Meets Dissolution

This month The Orchard passed a new milestone. We are no longer an incorporated non-profit in the state of Oregon. In that legal business sense, The Orchard has been dissolved.

The reason we originally incorporated was so we could take donations and allow people to claim a tax deduction. Our goal was never to make money for ourselves; I never planned to have a salary or to "be the Pastor". Rather, we wanted to collectively pool resources and give those funds away to the people in our lives who we knew needed the money.

As I referenced in A Bend In The Road, we were originally a "church plant" within the Association of Vineyard Churches. As such, we had some funds in our account as a start-up which had been a gift from our "sending church". So, over time, we simply gave all that money away.

One great example is a single mother whose minivan broke down. It would cost $1500 to fix it, or she could try and buy a used one for $2500+. She had about $1000 she could scrape up if she really scrimped, but either way she didn't have enough money. So, The Orchard wrote her a check for $1500, no strings attached. We didn't write the check to a mechanic or a used car lot. We wrote it to her personally and she got to decide what to do with it -- whether she used it toward a car or not wasn't the point. Expressing God's love to someone in need was the point. She was in tears and didn't really know what to say.

THAT's the kind of thing we wanted to do more of -- and so if people wanted to donate and help us decide where that money could best be donated, then at least all those who gave to The Orchard could get a deduction on their taxes.

Here's the deal though: no one ever gave us any money. No one. Ever. (not even us -- we didn't donate to our own non-profit!).

As the money in our account dwindled and ran out, we realized that we (Cathy & I, as a couple) would still be giving away money (and time and love, etc) to people around us who were in need, with or without a tax deduction, since that is not the point. And therefore we had no need to maintain a non-profit corporation. In fact, doing so sort of went against the basic essence of the last directive we really received from God about this whole journey we've been on here at The Orchard when The Orchard Master said to us:

"Don't build anything. Just love people"

So as of this month, according to the State of Oregon, "The Orchard Community" does not exist as an official entity. We've been dissolved.

Dissolved. Un-solved. I like that, since there are no easy answers.

And we're also now more disillusioned than ever.

But don't get me wrong: disillusionment is a good thing!

Being more and more disillusioned means we have fewer and fewer illusions; less deceptions and false visions in our sight as we look at the people in our lives and in the world around us, as we look at ourselves, and as we look to The Orchard Master for where we are all headed together on this crazy mixed up journey.

In our early days here in Oregon and just before we moved, I described what we were seeing like driving on a foggy road out in the country. We were not sure what we would look like or how we would function and "be" the church. We had some ideas of course, but they were vague and nebulous -- like looking out into the fog and seeing a general outline of a house. We knew there was "something" up ahead, but we were not sure what it was. I thought as we moved closer we would see it more and more clearly. Instead, quite the opposite has happened. The longer we are here, the more we realize what we thought we were seeing was not what it was at all. There were a lot of illusions as our eyes and our hearts played tricks on us.

So this month as we celebrate the arrival of another Spring,
And we consider the timing and wisdom behind the dissolution of our non-profit corporation,
And we enjoy the journey of dis-illusion-ment, we might just be starting to see some things more clearly.

The imagery and symbolism of an orchard still makes a lot of sense. But if all we ever look at is the orchard itself, we miss so much around us. As we begin to look around us as the fog clears a bit,
maybe when it is all said and done and disllusion meets dissolution there really is no house up ahead in the fog; no "place" for us to inhabit and "do things".

Perhaps instead we're seeing a natural playground, a wide expanse to explore and enjoy with whoever we encounter along the way. That sounds relaxing and fun; daring and adventurous and exciting: full of possibilities and new life and growth as we experience, enjoy, reciprocate and express Creator's great and marvelous ever-expansive love.

(click for larger version)

Peace,

~ Keith

One Vine, One Branch

For lent I gave up facebook. It hasn't been as hard as I thought it might be -- not really much of a sacrifice. But I suppose the sacrifice is not what it is about. For me, it is about making space for something else; creating an emptiness and then stepping back and allowing God to fill it.

He filled it...with an awareness of my emptiness; how stark it is & how right & good it is.

As per my usual, I began to see and think in terms of some comparative imagery. This is what my life is like right now:

I'm realizing the story of the three little pigs is not just a faery tale! Houses made of straw and twigs -- the trappings I've always felt protected by are really not sufficient shelter from the rains & winds which are bound to come in all lives. I want a house made of brick -- set firmly on the foundation of Jesus' Kingdom. The house He is building (Psalm 127:1) is the one I want to live in. But first the houses I've built (and the ones given to me which I've stepped into and tried to live in) must be left behind. There are three ways for this to happen:

1. Build brick re-inforcements around the current house. Valid option, but not what I am called to (think traditional churches adding contemporary services, and morphing over time into a contemporary church).
2. The old house of straw can come crashing down in one fell swoop, and I can go running like the first little pig into the house of my brother which looks A LOT stronger...and he and I can laugh and feel safe there, until the big bad wolf comes again -- and then he and I can both run away to the house of our brother who built with bricks, and find refuge there. Thank God that's not what we've experienced!
Neither of these really felt right to us. Instead, we've felt called to something different:
3. We've stepped away from the hard work we'd put into the other houses, and have begun to build a brick house.
   
   This takes time and energy and during the building, it feels very vulnerable...the wolf may happen along at any time and what if my house is not yet finished?

Plus, the most difficult piece is simply stepping *out* of the old house. We thought we'd done that but at every next season, it seems we are being called again and again to step out and leave the old behind.

And it seems more and more that the "building" is not so much a house being constructed as artificial support structures being demolished. Michelangelo was once asked how he could possibly sculpt something as magnificent as David. He replied "All I do is chip away what does not belong". That is what God is doing in me as He removes the shell. It is not so much about building a brick house as it is getting rid of the shell so that I can be free.

With Easter right around the corner, I'm realizing what a baby chick must feel.

emerging from the shell of religion into a new world of freedom is at first exhilerating: new light streams in, and there's fresh air. New sounds, etc. But once the majority of the shell is gone, it can be a bit frightening, cold, with no more shelter.

And I'm realizing how flimsy the shell is now that I'm on the outside looking back at it.

"Really? That is all that was protecting & feeding me?"

I'm starting to (just starting mind you) to understand Psalm 127:1 and the other Psalms which refer to Him as my Refuge, my Strong Tower, my Place of Shelter, my Rock.

In this place of emptiness there is work to do; I am not spiritually idle. But the work I do feels different. I feel like a member of a crew team

See that little dude at the far left, that's the coxswain. That's Jesus. I'm a crew member. I'm facing away from the destination, and have to trust the coxswain. All my hard effort is absent of seeing the prize, but with my ears and eyes and heart fixed on the one who *can* see the destination. He directs my strength; my rhythms of work and rest.

But this is all so new, and strange. What He's telling me is so freeing and life-giving, but so different from what I've ever known. It is like being pruned.

Bearing fruit is the goal, and if that means cutting away pieces that appeared fruitful, but were not as fruitful as the final result will be -- then trusting the Master Vintner's experience for what to cut and how far back, etc is a good thing...but is still difficult -- since to my relatively inexperienced eye, I'm thinking "But that piece was bearing some fruit..." or "You're cutting away too much! There's nothing left but a single solitary branch cut back to the beginning!"

And He says

"Yes, Keith but do you see that bud?..."

I do see it.

It is so small. It is so fragile; so vulnerable.

And it is so beautiful. It represents the beginnings of new life.

And while it still seems so stark and empty; so barren...

"You are The Vine. I am a single branch.
One vine. One branch.
I need nothing else.
That is enough for me."

~ Keith

A Prayer of Abandonment

I recently spent a week at an Abbey in Mt. Angel, OR.

A Monk's room is sometimes referred to as a cell -- and it has been said

Go into your cell,
and your cell will teach you
everything you need to know

There is a lot I learned, from my cell and other sources. One was a cool prayer:

A Prayer of Abandonment
by Br. Charles de Foucald

Father, I abandon myself into Your hands;
do with me what You will.
Whatever You do I thank You.
I am ready for all, I accept all.
Let only Your will be done in me,
as in all Your creatures,
I ask no more than this, my Lord.
Into Your hands I commend my soul;
I offer it to You, O Lord,
with all the love of my heart,
for I love You, my God, and so need to give myself--
to surrender myself into Your hands,
without reserve and with total confidence,
for You are my Father.

In looking around at info on him, I found a cool podcast to use as a daily devotional, called "Pray As You Go". I know, I know, a canned podcast? As a devotional? Well, I listened to one and really liked it, so I'm sharing it here.

Living Loved

Sometimes I wake up earlier than I need to and instead of falling back asleep I think and pray. This happened the other night. I've been pondering the idea of "living loved" recently and I was asking God what that means for me. I've been trying to figure out how to do that -- how to live loved -- but I'm at a loss sometimes. Over the past 5 years I've gone through some drastic changes, all good. But somewhere deep inside my heart I don't believe I'm fully loved just the way I am.

Many years ago in college I wrestled with the same stuff, and experienced a bit of healing when (of all things!) I saw a bumper sticker that said: "God loves you just the way you are, but He loves you too much to let you stay that way". That helped, but as I lay there in the dark, I realized there's still a hurt place in my heart, like an old splinter or shard of glass caught in a wound, that says "You need to be better before you can be loved".

I had finished telling God what I wanted help with and was trying to drift back to sleep, but a song started running through my head. It was a challenge to make it go away so I could fall back asleep. Then it dawned on me, as I lay there connecting with The Eternal One: I realized The Music Maker was trying to speak to my heart through that song if I would just listen! Wow -- it was like prayer really was a conversation, and not just me talking and never hearing a response! I've had similar experiences while running, and while riding my motorcycle, which I blogged about here. This time it was different though, because I was in bed, safe and warm and it was still very dark outside, and the house was very quiet. This meant that, in contrast to the other times, my senses were not being fully stimulated, so I could concentrate more fully on what was being said to my soul. I realize the lyrics below are incomplete, and not in the exact order Billy Joel wrote them, but this is what I heard in my heart, over and over until I realized it was from God, for me:

I would not leave you, in times of trouble,
I've never let you down before,
I just want someone, that I can talk to,
I want you just the way you are.

I need to know that you will always be
The same old someone that I knew,
What will it take till you believe in me,
The way that I believe in you?

I said I love you, and that's forever,
And this I promise from the heart,
I couldn't love you, any better,
I love you just the way you are.

Wow. I did finally drift back to sleep, and experienced a real peace. I guess "living loved" is not something I have to "try" and "do" as much as something I need to receive and allow.

Writing this brings tears back to my eyes as I ponder how richly I am loved by God. And the idea of having to be different before I can be loved made me remember a post I did here on the profound truth God spoke to me through a simple story about a velveteen rabbit:

I don't have to be real to be loved.
I have to be loved to be real.

That post was from early 2006, but reminded me that this journey I've been on goes back to late 2003 -- that is when God first began nudging my heart in the direction I am still pointed. Only it took me until just this moment to connect all the dots and see how His hand has been on me this entire time. His love for me shines through the fact that He has brought me full circle in some ways -- this journey has not been just a bunch of random moves here and there (theologically, ecclesiastically, and geographically). It is all part of the same thing in my heart as He loves me into realness.

I guess Paul knew what he was talking about when he told the folks in Philippi that it was God who was at work in them -- both to give them the desires and to give them the abilities to walk out the life He'd called them to. And that same God is doing the same thing in me.

Living loved is easier and harder than I've ever thought, but that's OK. It's a good thing!

Bamboo Songs

In Autumn of 2007, I posted here about us being more like bamboo than ferns. In that post I referenced that it might be 18 months or more until we had any official meetings. It is now Summer 2010 and, while we've had a couple brief seasons of meeting with a few folks, at this writing we have no "official meetings". This past weekend I had some time to ponder and pray about things and was comforted by some perspective I gained.

As I ran and then later as I rode my motorcycle two songs kept running through my head. The first was Power of Love by Huey Lewis & The News:

The Power of love is a curious thing
Make'a one man weep, make another man sing
Change a hawk to a little white Dove
More than a feelin'
That's the Power of Love

You'll be glad baby when you've found
that's the power makes the world go 'round

These lyrics were freeing to me, remembering that The Spirit of The Master is in charge of what we are doing here, and there are no results we can work up, or hype. Instead, everything rests on God's promises of love.

And as I reflected on this, that's when lyrics from Don't Stop Thinking About Tomorrow by Fleetwood Mac came to my mind, as if God were encouraging me to relax, enjoy myself in the now, and quit worrying about stuff that I don't need to hang onto -- that I can just look forward, and trust The Love that empowers and directs us:

All I want is to see you smile,
If it takes just a little while,
Open your eyes and look at the day,
You'll see things in a different way.

Don't stop, thinking about tomorrow,
Don't stop, it'll soon be here,
It'll be, better than before,
Yesterday's gone, yesterday's gone.

This was all very encouraging to me as I pondered the "not yet-ness" of what we are doing. You see, it is sometimes tempting to think "nothing is happening -- we've got to do something!" but the truth is, there is phenomenal work going on...it is just not visible work.

And as I re-read the above referenced post while writing this one, I was even further encouraged by reading on Wikipedia that bamboo grows in 3-7 year cycles of harvesting, so in our analogue, it is OK that now, at the 2-3 year point, there is nothing viable which is visible to anyone else.

So, there is no rush for us. We do not have to make anything happen. We couldn't if we tried, and wouldn't want to even if we could...

It is very stabilizing to remember that one of the founding ideas of what we are doing here in the first place is that we don't believe our calling has anything to do with trying to make anything happen.

So here we are, continuing to rest and cultivate roots.

~ Keith

Baked Ham in Paradise

Today is Easter. I like to think of this as "Christian New Year" -- the first Easter, when the first followers first discovered Jesus' tomb was empty was the first day in a new chapter in a bigger story than any of us can imagine; a story worth living in.

For many people, Jesus-Followers or not, it is also a wonderful feast day, filled with chocolate and other candy, eggs and treats of all sorts; and families gathering to share a meal. Winn Griffin shared this today and I thought it was worth passing along:

"There are eight meal scenes in the story of Luke. The seventh one was what we traditionally call the Last Supper. The eighth one was on the day of resurrection with the husband and wife that Jesus met on the Road to Emmaus.

Think of the first meal in the Garden. The moment is heavy with significance. “The woman took some of the fruit, and ate it, she gave it to her husband, and he ate it; then the eyes of the both were opened, and they knew that they were naked (Gen 3.6-7). This first meal of the new creation was celebrated with a male and female. One shouldn’t pass to quickly by in the reading of the Luke 24 text without noticing the echoes of the first meal in the Garden. Describing the first meal of the new creation, Luke says, “He took the bread, blessed it, broke it, and gave it to them, then the eyes of them both were opened, and they recognized him” (Luke 24.31).

The first couple’s eyes were opened and they saw themselves naked. At the beginning of the new creation, this couple’s eyes were opened and they recognized Jesus. They recognized him in the breaking of the bread.

If you have an opportunity to receive communion as you celebrate the Resurrection, the beginning of the new creation in this present evil age, do so and let your eyes be opened to all the new creation in Jesus offers. It’s a story worth living in."

A story worth living in, indeed.

And I wonder, in the final chapter, what that first meal will be like in the New Orchard when we all gather with eternally-opened eyes and share together in the celebration feast? I'm hungry!

Happy Easter everyone...may all your best hungers be satisfied today and in this new year.

The Donkey was a Comma

Today is "Palm Sunday" -- the Sunday before Easter when Christians traditionally celebrate Jesus' "Triumphal entry" into Jerusalem -- the "City of Peace".

His entry is called "triumphal" because the crowds lay their cloaks and palm branches at his feet, or rather the feet of the donkey he rode. In the culture of that day this gesture was a sign that they were recognizing him as king. They were shouting "Hosanna!" which means "Save us!" and yet in this context it was more like "Hurray! You're here to save us!!!". They were also shouting about Jesus being "Son of David" (their last great military king) and "Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord." Essentially they were saying "You da man!!!! You're the ambassador -- the personal representative -- of God himself, and you're here to take over the place and then YOU will rule over us instead of us being ruled by these oppressive Romans or all the other people groups that have kept us down! Thank you! You rock!"

But they missed something. Just. Didn't. See it.

 It's like punctuation. There's a big difference between:

"How are you my friend?"

and

"How are you, my friend?"

That one little comma makes a huge difference in the meaning of the phrase being communicated.

The donkey was a comma, and the people missed it. That one little crucial detail turned the whole thing around. And they Just. Didn't. See it.

Because they didn't want to. The donkey was a symbol of lowliness, humility. A triumphant king entering a city he had just conquered would have ridden the biggest strongest most impressive stallion in his stables.

Jesus rode a borrowed donkey.

Jesus wasn't conquering anything with military might or power. He was coming in peace, riding a symbol of humility. He let the people say what they were saying because it was right and true -- they just didn't see the whole picture -- didn't understand the sense of timing.

Less than a week later that same crowd would be angry -- likely feeling like the victims of some great cosmic bait & switch. The same crowds that shouted "Hosanna!" would be shouting "CRUCIFY HIM!!!" I wonder if the ones who were really gung-ho about staging a military coup (they called themselves "Zealots") went out and killed the donkey?

Today is Palm Sunday. Jesus is still riding a borrowed donkey as he enters my town of Salem, OR (a city called Peace). Will I let myself see the donkey?

I wonder how much I miss today when I look at Jesus riding into my life? What do I not see because I don't want to see it? What are my expectations on him? What do I shout when I first see him? What do I shout later this week when my expectations aren't realized, and I'm left to face the truth that he was on a donkey the whole time?

Lenten Feasting and Fasting

This is from the Friday morning eucharistic ceremony @  Mount Calvary (courtesy of our good friend Fran -- blessings on your head!)

Lenten Feasting and Fasting:

Lent is more than a time of fasting;
it can also be a joyous season of feasting.

Lent is a time to fast from certain things,
and to feast on others.

Fast from judging others

Feast on the Christ dwelling in them

Fast from emphasis on differences

Feast on the unity of life

Fast from apparent darkness

Feast on the reality of light

Fast from thoughts of illness

Feast on the healing power of God

Fast from words that pollute

Feast on words of purity

Fast from discontent

Feast on gratitude

Fast from anger

Feast on patience

Fast from pessimism

Feast on optimism

Fast from worry

Feast on Divine Providence

Fast from complaining

Feast on appreciation

Fast from negatives

Feast on affirmatives

Fast from unrelenting pressures

Feast on unceasing prayer

Fast from hostility

Feast on peace

Fast from bitterness

Feast on forgiveness

Fast from self-concern

Feast on compassion for others

Fast from personal anxiety

Feast on trust

Fast from discouragement

Feast on hope

Fast from acts that tear down

Feast on acts which build up

Fast from thoughts that weaken

Feast on promises that inspire

Fast from idle gossip

Feast on purposeful silence

Fast from problems which overwhelm

Feast on prayer that undergirds

New Sprouts

On Sat 15th August The Orchard Community had the wonderful honor of celebrating the dedication of Catherine Marie "Cate" O'Connor

Cate!
Cate & Grandma
Cate & Great Grandpa
Cate & Grandma
Dedicating Cate
Hanging out with family!

Time To Stop

Today is the Summer Solstice -- literally "Sun Stands Still". The following is unashamedly cut/pasted from Inward/Outward

By Barbara Brown Taylor

For years I had kept hoping that intimacy with God would blossom as soon as I got everything done, got everyone settled, got my environment just right and my calendar cleared. I counted on it to come as a reward for how hard I had worked, or at least as the built-in consequence of a life of service, but even when I managed to meet all of my conditions for a day or two, I was so exhausted from the effort that I could not keep my eyes open. Slumber spirituality took over, and when I woke up I was right back where I started with miles to go toward the home I never quite reached.

Soon after I moved to the country, a friend from the city set out to see me and got seriously lost. These were the days before cell phones, so she was on her own with nothing but my directions and a badly out-of-date map. Already an hour later than she wanted to be, she was speeding through a little town when she saw the blue lights in her rearview mirror.I forgot to warn her that it was a speed trap. Busted, she pulled over on the shoulder of the road and had her license ready when the officer arrived at her window.

“I am so sorry,” she said, handing it to him along with her registration. “I know I was speeding, but I’ve been lost for the last forty minutes and I cannot find Tower Terrace anywhere on this map.”

“Well, I’m sorry about that too, ma’am,” he said, writing up her citation, “but what made you think that hurrying would help you find your way?”

what made you think that
hurrying
would help you
find your way?

What made any of us think that the place we are trying to reach is far, far ahead of us somewhere and that the only way to get there is to run until we drop? For Christians, at least part of the answer is that many of us have been taught to think of God’s kingdom as something outside ourselves, for which we must search as a merchant searches for the pearl of great price.

But even that points to a larger and more enduring human problem, which is the problem of mortality. With a limited number of years to do whatever it is that we are supposed to be doing here, who has time to stop?

Barbara Brown Taylor is a writer and teacher at Piedmont College in Georgia. She was ordained an Episcopal priest and writes about the life of the church—and the church of life. This excerpt is from her book called Leaving Church: A Memoir of Faith.

I think the real question is not "How can I afford to take time to stop?" but instead "If The Master has ordained the sun two times every year to stand still, how can I afford not to follow the example set in the heavens for all to see?"

New Growth

Today is the first day of Spring, and we're enjoying the warmth of brighter days and clearer skies.

We've begun meeting with another couple for weekly dinner and discussion. We've been sharing our stories thus far and looking forward to how we want to explore faith and community together. We come from a variety of faith backgrounds and levels of understanding, and are really enjoying the warmth of friendship and clearer futures.

The buds are just starting to form, but the growth deep inside (eagerly waiting to burst out and bloom!) is there and raising our hopes; fulfilling our dreams.

Kingdom & Missionality

Cathy & I recently attended a 2-day gathering in Vancouver, WA featuring Rev. Todd Hunter & Dr. Winn Griffin. It was an inspiring time, and I provided a tweet-stream under the hash-tag #kmvanc. For those of you who didn't get to follow it, you can get the stream here. As with a blog, you'll need to go to the last page and read bottom-to-top to get the chronological feel of it.

~ Keith

(I had thought of cutting and pasting each tweet, and creating links and such...but that would be WAY too much work!)

More Reading? You Want MORE Reading?

You've read through a bunch of posts and still have questions; you still want to read more about what it is we're trying to do; who it is we're trying to become, but you're not ready to eMail us and start a conversation just yet. That's OK -- you asked for it!

Probably the best thing you could do is go to my other blog The Can Opener Boy Translations and read through the posts with the labels "church" and "following Jesus"

You can also read these four foundational posts:

1. What is church?
2. What is your role in receiving from the church?
3. What is your role in giving to the church?
4. What is your role in participating in the missional nature of the church?

Also good for you to read would be this post I did about how we view other churches and our relation to them.

Happy reading!

~ Keith

Filling In

On the 1 year anniversary of our arrival in Oregon, I had the privilege of being a guest speaker for my friend Jon Nethers at the Sunset Vineyard in Hillsboro. If you'd like you can check out the audio link here:

Community = Cross Pollenation

Some day, when we begin having community gatherings, we want them to be communal meals and worship collaboratives where everyone present can bring something to share, so that everyone's lives are enriched.

This past weekend we went to the lavender festival at Daffodil Hill. It was a beautifully sunny (hot!) weekend and we had a very nice time. We looked at some nice art pieces and smelled wonderfully fresh fragrances. We spent a long time clipping fresh lavender. We got really hot and sweaty and a nice woman working there came and spritzed us with fresh lavender water -- very refreshing! (once home, Cathy fashioned all the lavender into little bouquets for a few of our neighbors, which they loved!). In a small shed made into a small store, there were lavender products for sale. Around the top of the walls was painted a quote by Judy Phipps, the owner of Daffodil Hill. It does a good job of capturing what I would like to see in the life of our commmunity:

"Experiences are the elements from which our fondest memories spring -- the doing, the being, the sharing -- the coming together of friends all contributing their strengths of humor, intellect, creativity and compassion, to leave us more than we began with -- more laughter, more friendships, more smiles from the recollections we will forever cherish"
~ J Phipps

Spring Stillness

Yesterday was the vernal equinox.

Now it is Spring.

The world around us is alive with color and sound as buds open and small birds move in for the season. Amidst this activity it is easy to get caught up in the busyness of the world around us, and bow to the tyranny of the urgent.

This morning I was reminded of a better way:

The world gives itself
up to incessant activity
merely because
it knows of nothing
better.
The inspired man
works among
its whirring wheels
also; but he knows
whither the wheels
are going,
for he has found
the centre
where all is
stillness...

~ Paul Brunton

Flowers & Friends

Flowers are wonderful, but if a gardener spends time trying, at any certain frequency, to make a flower grow that gardener will quickly become frustrated. Likewise a plant is lovely to look at and it is delightful to watch it grow over time, but one cannot make a plant grow any more than one can make a flower grow. Roots also, important as they are, cannot be coerced.

To be sure, even a novice gardener has plants which produce flowers, and an accomplished gardener has at his or her disposal a full array of tools and wisdom to enhance and ensure growth and bloom. At the end of the day though, all a gardener can do is remove obstacles to growth and provide food, water and sunlight to the plant as it grows.

Sometimes the more fragile, beautiful, or fragrant (read: valuable) a flower, the more likely the plant will have thorns or some other mechanism of protection. A creature attempting to harm the plant will suffer pain -- while the gardener, in wisdom and care, can prune and trim the plant at will and only occasionally be pricked by a thorn.

In my ponderings one recent morning I came to this realization about life and relationships:

Depth of trust is the flower,
relationship is the plant,
and the roots are love.

If one's main intent is to help the plant thrive, and one accomplishes this by providing food and water to the roots, and diligently, carefully caring for the plant itself, then flowers will come as a natural overflow of the health of the plant.

But if one focuses solely on trying to produce flowers, neglecting the roots and the plant, then any blooms produced will be inferior, short lived, and less fragrant.

~ Keith